Since I’ve been off work this week, keeping myself occupied has been a full-time job. If I pause for even a moment, all I can hear in my head is BABY, BABY, TESTING, BABY on a loop. It’s enough to drive a person crazier than they already are. Since Monday, I have cleaned the entire house, washed everything we own, made three trips to the grocery, completed my Christmas shopping, wrapped all gifts. I think that’s it. Now it is 10am on testing morning and there is nothing I can do to distract myself. I can’t work on classes, I can’t focus enough to read, I can’t even listen to the Today show. All I can think about is ARE WE PREGNANT? ARE WE PREGNANT? ARE WE PREGNANT?. This is intermingled with PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. It’s pretty pathetic, but it’s where I am. I’m not fighting it anymore. I’m giving myself over to the pull.
RING PHONE. RING!!!!